30 minutes ago

the closed door opens

and u walk backwards

the empty coffee grows warm and

your joy and sorrow bring in words

before i heard you say goodbye

before you made a bad expression

before you made a sad expression

the hand that held the cup doesn't shake or hesitate

30 minutes ago,

my heart wasn't broken

my face wasn't soaked with tears

no matter how much I cry, time will only move forward

the goodbye between you and me, it can;t be undone

to 30 minutes ago.

the sunshine was so beautiful

seeing you make my heart race

you saddenned voice which captured my heart

we should leave now

everyone looking at you

it's embarrassing that you makeup is messy because of tears

30 minutes ago, the time should have stopped

but the sunshine is still the same

the clock is ticking

i can't rewind anything back

to 30 minutes ago.

If I go...

If I go...
enjoy life
make new frins
capture different memories
cook myself
travel when holiday
different study environment
blonde people around
improve my communication
experience lot of things

If I go...

leave my parent alone

spend lot of money

miss my bro & frins

can't drive to school

miss my mum's cook

need study harder

nobody helps when I get trouble

My life = my life

A man in my dream...

A dream,
i lost someone..
an important person...
as I remember,
he was trying to commit suicide
because of his lovers...
and he's missing...

he is king, i think,
he got many women,
who he's love and who love him...
I am included, one..who fell in love with him...

Everybody trying to find him, doesn't know he is still alive or not...
there was a lift to the top, his women just want to find him,
so everyone take the lift and they want to be the first person to got him...
It was like a hide and seek...but,
nobody found him...
and my dream jump to attend his funeral so sudden...

I wear a white dress, crying...
I hope he's still here...
the feeling so deeply, he just like a family member or a partner...
that i don't want and i can't without him in my live...
and i woke up with tears*

Casino

Finally without blocking, i am freely to big big step in to the "Casino"...

Just a mood, not a purpose for gamble...so, this can be called as "antecedent state... Am i right, Mr Prem? Lol...

Another beginning...

Hoping all my wishes, come true...

Fighting June & Everyone^^

*A Happy*

I mean a really feeling of happy.

"It is like a treasure to me."

Can i have it to be my Birthday Present???

I hope to keep it forever and share it with my family...

working at BO...

BO= Brands Outlet (Jusco Bkt Indah)

Day of the fifth, i worked at BO...it is tired, my legs so pain...T.T...but i enjoyed...^^ think about the salary, actually not much, but better than dun have...so i can save more money in bank...lol...

i'm quite lucky because my colleagues treat me not bad.. they are fun!

I think i can remember all their names, June, Meena, Joy, Beena, Sabarina, Meili, Wilson, Ajimah, Siti, and so on...lol

Actually another purpose to work is to lose my weight, but quite hard ard, because they always bring me out for lunch and dinner...=.=

Pls myself, u can do it!!!

money come x 3!!! my fat go x 3!!!

cheers*

June*

I found in Urban Dictionary...

"June"

June babies are sweet, caring, sexy, lovable and all around cuddly.

Cause June is just awesome that way...

A fairly uncommon girls' name presently. It was often used during the 1940s and 50s. They are few and far between. Often, women named June are opinionated and outspoken. Also, they emit an aura of confidence that makes them instantly attractive.

If you meet a girl named June, you are lucky.

Just check it out yours..^^

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=name

DeSire...

Something you can't control yourself to have it...

I can't calm down myself to keep thinking for my further study...

I did a lot of researches..I hope it can be use..one day...

I really WANT to have a different life...

to keep experiencing my memories...

Now is like a breathe stuck there...always...

I keep trouble myself...

what if it can't comply...

i really don't know how depth of disappoint can be ...

which i can't afford...

I think I will lost my motivation...

Think another way, what if it is not a good choice to goes on...so..hmm...

bless*

Exam 2010

Today, i took my first paper of my degree...

"Management Accounting"..i hope i can pass enough..
another coming exams too...^^

I cant sleep last night, because i worry about the exam...
I did prepared earlier and enough if nth more,
but still scare i will forget everything when in examination...
Now is different with diploma, not just we have to gain 50% and above, we also need to done well in tests and assignments as it contains the majority which help us to fill up the additional marks... thats why we always busy for homeworks...
Through the last semester of diploma, i failed 2 subjects which i tot i can pass...
Therefore, i couldn't attend the graduation wif my sistersss...T.T
Its really becomes my bad memories of taking exams...

Pls, my dear God...let us pass all the subjects sucessfully....bless ^^

我们应该学习怎样尊重我们身边的人。

这已经不是第一次了。

每个人都有他忍耐的限度。

我是人，也是女生。

难道你不觉得你的玩笑总是太过分而让人忍不下去吗？

以为我是没脾气的人，总是让你当作玩笑来侮辱我？

重点是，我从来都没反驳过你，反而当作没听到，或一笑而过。

所以跟我开这种玩笑，根本对你一点乐趣都没有，不是吗？

可我为什么不能为了自己勇敢地阻止你一次，反而还要当众让我察决你那难听的嘲骂。

想让我知道什么?

‘XXX...我以为我是谁？XXX’

为什么要这样？

朋友不应该是这样对待的，不是你没朋友，而是你不会让朋友留住你。

Blue...

Blue is the color of the sky and sea. It is often associated with depth and stability. It symbolizes trust, loyalty, wisdom, confidence, intelligence, faith, truth, and heaven.

Blue is calming. It can be strong and steadfast or light and friendly. Almost everyone likes some shade of the color blue.

你不开心吗?

有人这么问我,你不开心吗?

还记得以前有个人,整天就只会问我"你开心吗?",可是他就从来没问过我"你不开心吗?"

忽然回忆涌上心里,原来我以前是这么的快乐,就好像个无忧无虑的小孩.

可是现在不同了, 有许多的烦恼,一个一个的难题,正等待着我去解决.这样我能够算是成人了吗?哈哈...

应该算是小成人吧...

有时还是会有点不成熟=无聊,lol, 应该要具体的说在人格方面...但,我就是喜欢这样...因为成熟的人,生活太没趣了...我觉得该成熟的时候就要成熟,该无聊的时候就要无聊,这样就算有再多的考验,也能笑一笑就解决掉啦...没错吧...

I have to make a decision...

"If I choose to....it will change my life...but..."

Honestly, i do feel dispirited and senseless for my life... because there are something have been changed...

I am the only child, besides my dad out for work and sometimes my mum will "lepak" with friends. Usually there's only me will stay at home...no companion for any sibling or pets....

maybe u think i'm lonely but nope...because i'm quite active person to find lots of things to do...

Actually alone is a kind of interest...err...sometimes....

which can clear your mind and think what u want to think....so i get used to it...Thats's why,

Now, through 21 yrs, my mind was making troubles that create many requests...

i would like to experience more in my life not just only travels...maybe there're something I can expect for...

But...can I? and...worth it?

Can't without you, "M"

work is... because of money...

purpose is... earn more, then I can spend more, that's all...

my first job,it comes when i'm still Sec 3...also is the last to get pocket money from parent...

not really don't get anymore, but just less than before and not sequence...

i think i have been tried many different kind of jobs those are in the range of my age...

although sometimes, all those boring jobs make me frustrated and busy but its became my habit in life...

Now i'm free...i give up all jobs to be concentrate in my study...

some usual become unusual..

i feel boring that nothing to do, always stay at home...so what to do? if go out will spend more....

now i need to manage how to spend not over in a month and still can save a little...

that's really i never think much before...

feeling tough for M..."can't without u"...

Begins here...

I'm sitting on my bed...creating my FIRST blog here...

Its such a hot weather makes me tired, sweating and confuse...not only that...

Tired, because not enough sleep;

Sweating, because air-con broke down;

Confuse, because my life too flexible...

Want to swim or dun want to swim? Haiz... can't make decision directly....That's me...sometimes...

hm...mostly actually...

I need someTHINGS to happen on me...

So...in the future those can be my own "memorable"...

That's what we need in our LIFE...right?

yes...^^

cheers*